Graduation
B=Buffy, G=Giles, X=Xander, W=Willow, C=Cordelia, O=Oz, A=AngelJ=Joyce, PS=Principal Snyder, WP=Wesley, F=Faith, M=Mayor Wilkins
C: I can't believe this loser look. I lobbied so hard for the teal. No one ever listens to me. Lone fashionable wolf.
X: I like the maroon. It has more dignity.
C: Dignity? You? In relation to clothes? I'm awash in a sea of confusion.
X: I just want to look respectable in this... considering I'm probably gonna die in it.
C: Excuse me?
X: I'm telling you, I woke up the other day with this feeling in my gut. I just know. There is no way I'm getting out of this school alive.
C: Well, you've really mastered the power of positive giving up.
X: I've been lucky too many times. My number's coming up. And I was short. One more rotation and I'm shipping stateside. You know what I mean?
C: Seldom, if ever.
H: You know, I really wish we could have got to know each other better.
W: Me, too.
H: I mean, you're so smart. I always wanted to be like that.
W: Thanks, you're so sweet!
H: I hope we don't lose touch.
W: No, we'll hang out. Oh, I'm gonna miss her.
B: Don't you hate her?
W: Yes, with a fiery vengeance. She picked on me for 10 years. The vacuous tramp. It's like a sickness, Buffy. I'm just missing everything. I miss P.E.
B: I think it's contagious. The whole senior class has turned into the 60's. Or what I would have imagined the 60's would have been like, you know, without the war and the hairy armpits.
X: Guess who our commencement speaker is?
W: Siegfried?
X: No.
W: Roy?
X: No.
W: One of the tigers?
X: Come out of the fantasy, Will.
X: Lends credence to my whole "I'm gonna die" theorem, doesn't it?
Lester: I'll scream!
F: Who wouldn't?
F: Sorry, friend. The boss wants you dead.
Lester: Why?
F: You know, I never thought to ask.
MW: And everything went smoothly with Mr. Worth?
F: Not if you're Mr. Worth.
MW: Well, that's swell.
F: I feel wicked stupid in this.
MW: You look lovely. Perfect for the Ascension. Any boys that manage to survive will be lining up to ask you out.
MW: Nobody knows what you are. Not even you, little Miss Seen-it-all.
P: Check it out - history final.
W: B: minus! That's great.
P: I'm a scholar. I'm like a scholar!
P: Hey, listen, thank you. I mean, for helping me. Being so patient. And also, for not kicking my ass like you did in the Bronze.
W: you know, Percy, that was actually... for your own good.
W: It's bad enough we have to fight the mayor. I don't want him eating Percy and the whole class.
Teacher: Mr. Harris, would you care to begin?
X: Um... E?
Teacher: No, there's no "E". They always go for the "E".
An: So, I was wondering, maybe if you're free this weekend, maybe we could do some... entertaining thing.
X: Would that be along the lines of you telling me about all the men you destroyed back in your demon days? 'Cause, pencil me in.
An: We could watch sports of some kind.
X: Uh, I don't know.
An: Men like sports. I'm sure of it.
X: Yes, men like sports. Men watch the action movie. They eat of the beef and enjoy to look at the bosoms. A thousand years of avenging our wrongs, and that's all you've learned?
B: Faith.
WP: You're sure?
B: It's one of her pieces. I recognize the brushwork.
G: There's nothing in here that bellows "motive".
WP: Everybody does seem to be going a bit mad lately. Faith has something of a head-start.
B: If the mayor's trying to hide, I say we go seek.
WP: Ah, by attempting to keep a valuable clue from us, the mayor may have inadvertently led us right to it.
B: What page are you on, Wes? 'Cause we already got there.
B: I just love it when you take charge, you man, you.
WP: But, wha... was that a yes? I'm having trouble keeping track.
B: Been there, killed that... she'd not much for follow-up.
G: Faith has you at a disadvantage, Buffy.
B: 'Cause I'm not crazy, or 'cause I don't kill people?
G: Both, actually.
B: I can't kill her. Fun as it may sound.
B: Stopping Faith _is_ my work. Take a beat to love the synergy.
An: I was there cursing a shepherd who'd been unfaithful. His wife wished that all his sheep would lie-
B: Can we cut back to the chase?
An: I've seen some horrible things in my time and life. I've been the cause of most of them, actually...
An: You've never seen a demon.
B: Excuse me - killing them professionally, four years running.
MW: Sunnydale owes you a debt. It will be repaid. Yes, sir, we'll mark that invoice "Paid in full".
W: How come evil girl's in the mix?
G: Anya witnessed an ascension.
W: Oh, okay then.
MW: "The several races of man will be as one in their terror and destruction." Oh, that's kind of sweet. Different races coming together.
B: You never get even a little tired of hearing yourself speak, do you?
MW: That's one spunky little girl you've raised. I'm gonna eat her.
MW: Whoa! Now, that was a little thoughtless. Violent outbursts like that, in front of the children.
C: What's her saga?
X: She's freaking.
C: About what?
X: The mayor is gonna kill us all during graduation.
C: Oh. Are you gonna go to 5th period?
J: What are you doing? You're running away again? And you're taking my clothes.
B: Mom, graduation is a pointless ceremony where you sit around and listen to a bunch of boring speeches till someone hands you a piece of paper that says you've graduated, which you already know, and maroon does nothing for my complexion.
J: Oh, you know, Buffy, looking back at everything that's happened, maybe I should have sent you to a different school.
B: I wish I could be a lot of things for you - a great student, a star athlete, remotely normal.
W: Oh, this is frustrating.
O: Nothing useful?
W: No, it's great... if we want to make ferns invisible, or communicate with shrimp, I've got the goods right here.
O: Our lives are different than other people's.
O: You think I don't care?
W: I think we could be dead in two days time, and you're being ironic detachment guy.
O: Would it help you if I panicked?
W: Yes! It'd be swell.
W: What are you doing?
O: Panicking.
B: Stealthy.
A: Not my best entrance.
A: Anything in there that connects him to the mayor?
B: I looked through it, but the only thing I understood were the commas.
A: Are you mad at me for being around too much, or for not being around enough?
B: Duh, yes!
B: I know. World in peril and we have to work together. This is my last office romance, I'll tell you that.
Vamp: Missed the heart.
F: Meant to.
B: I'm just glad Faith is such a suck shot.
G: We're sure it was her?
B: Well, I've narrowed down my list of one suspect.
W: I feel different, you know? But I guess that makes sense. Do you feel different? Oh, no, you've already... Probably no big change for you. It was nice. Was it nice? Should this be a quiet moment?
O: I know exactly what you mean.
W: Which part?
O: Everything feels different.
MW: I have to ingest several of the inhabitants of this box.
F: Ingest?
MW: Eat.
F: You're wicked gross.
F: Don't you need anyone dead or maimed? I could settle for maimed.
An: When I think that something could happen to you, it feels bad inside, like I might vomit.
X: Welcome to the world of romance.
An: It's horrible. No wonder I used to get so much work.
X: Well, I'm sorry I gave you barfy feelings.
X: I got friends on the line.
An: So?
X: That humanity thing's still a work in progress, isn't it?
An: Fine. You know what? I hope you die. Aren't we gonna kiss?
WP: We're talking about laws which have existed longer than civilization.
B: I'm talking about watching my lover die.
WP: You can't turn your back on the Council.
B: They're in England. I don't think they can tell which way my back is facing.
WP: Giles, talk to her.
G: I have nothing to say right now.
WP: We need a strategy.
B: I have a strategy. You're not in it.
WP: This is mutiny.
B: I like to think of it as... graduation.
X: I just don't want to lose you.
B: I won't get hurt.
X: That's not what I mean.
X: Boy, it's a good thing no one ever wanted to check any of these books out, huh?
G: Yes, very convenient.
X: Come on, Olvikan. Hey... We're gonna need a bigger boat.
MW: My god, what a feeling. The power of these creatures. It suffuses my being. I can feel the changes begin. My organs are shifting, merging, making ready for the Ascension. Plus these babies are high in fiber, and what's the fun of becoming an immortal demon if you're not regular, am I right?
MW: We don't knock during dark rituals?
F: That's mine.
B: You're about to get it back.