Twas the deadline before Christmas and all through the Planet,
All workers were working but Perry, who ranted.
The paper was nestled all snug in the press,
Except for one section, the front page, no less.
Clark Kent and Lois were both on the phone
Wistfully dreaming it was time to go home
They had special plans for this special eve
If Bobby Bigmouth would call, they could finish and leave.
When out on the street there arose a great shout
They ran to the window -- reporters *can't* be left out.
Jimmy grabbed his Nikon and started to click
Praying his shots would be Perry's first pick.
It was a huge float, bright and festively dressed
But the holiday traffic was less than impressed.
Besides the mess tying up three traffic lights,
There were eight Kleenex villains, all looking for fights.
With a starring attraction so smug and laid-back
They knew in a moment Lex Luthor was back!
His henchmen, they threatened the crowd as they came,
And he laughed and he gloated and called them by name.
"On Soundman! On Churches! On Tempus, Metallo!
On Prankster! On Nigel, with loyalties shallow!
To the end of the street and the brand-new subway
We'll own this whole city by dawn Christmas Day!"
The whole parade stopped right in front of the paper
The primary target of Luthor's new caper.
The villians cut right through the crowds and the door
Piled into the elevator, up to the news floor.
As Luthor strolled in like he owned the place
Clark made a break for it, looking for space.
Lois covered his exit with one mightly blow,
Throwing the Prankster out into the snow.
"Lois, how could you?" Lex said with a frown,
To kill the poor guy on his first night in town."
"He's not dead," a new voice cut through the air,
And the window flew open -- the hero was there!
Superman dropped the crook to the ground
And glared at the villains gathered around.
"Ah, Supes, right on time, good to see you again,"
Luthor said with a wide, very suspicious grin.
His head was still bald, but his eyes they shone bright
As he pictured the chaos he'd create this night.
An expensive cigar 'tween his teeth he held tight
While his right hand revealed green Kryptonite!
The Man of Steel staggered against his old foe
To the delight of that unmelted fink Metallo
Tempus told the Churches, both father and son
That their bold game had already been won!
Lois and Jimmy shared one frightened glance
They knew Superman was the city's last chance.
It was Perry who saved Superman's cooking goose
A rolled-up newspaper knocked Lex's stone loose.
Lois caught the rock and threw it away
To Lex and his henchmen's total dismay
Supes had them tied up while they were still blinking
And couldn't say the bad words they were thinking.
"Wow, great shot, chief!" Jimmy yelled loudly.
"Just like the old days," Perry said proudly.
"Did I ever tell you, when Elvis was young,
He had a paper route and an arm like a gun?"
Lois and Superman hugged in relief
Then he lifted the crooks who had given them grief.
And they heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight,
"Lois, I'm sorry, I'll be late tonight!"
Oh all right! < pout >
And they heard him exclaim as he flew out of sight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all, a good night!"
There, happy now?
Finis
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